Many wives are burdensome?"Nameless housework" such as bottle refills, how do you share with a couple?(Adults) --Yahoo! News

How to get along with "unnamed housework"?

"Refill shampoo and detergent", "Replace the box when the tissue paper is cut," "soak in water before washing dishes." Although it does not fall under so -called "housework" such as "cleaning" and "laundry", the accompanying work is called "an unnamed housework". The number of couples who share housework such as "cooking is a wife, cleaning is a husband" is increasing, but most of the "unnamed housework", which is difficult to classify for typical housework, has a wife, and there is a husband in the first place. It seems that there are many cases where my wife feels burdensome because I do not notice. It seems that some couples have calmed down Corona, and the number of opportunities to go to the office increases, and the way of sharing housework changes. How should the couple be involved with the "unnamed housework"? I asked Yasuyuki Kimura, a couple counselor.

Bottle refills, tissue replacement, refrigerator arrangement ...

Q.Are there many cases where the burden of "unnamed housework" concentrates on one side of the couple? Mr. Kimura: "The unnamed housework" is a wide variety of people, so some people feel burdensome, others do not suffer. It is a type that is in terms of personality and is worried about the details. If you don't do housework, you'll feel uncomfortable. If you think so, the way you perceive it will change a lot. In my consultant, there will be a passing through a "nameless housework". The case is rare. In addition to the fact that such housework is a routine work, I think that the passing between the couple is more likely to pass each other than the passing of "housework". However, if you are a young couple, there are many people who feel affection by behavior. Especially during pregnancy or when you're tired and tired, you'll want to help me a little. So, a passing may occur. "Q.Despite the fact that men are participating in housework, looking at the opinions on the Internet, it is more impressive than her husband who is suffering from the burden on "unnamed housework". Mr. Kimura: "Nameless housework" is diverse, but most of them occur in the house. Refill various bottles, replace toilet paper and tissue boxes, soak in water before washing dishes. Anyway, it occurs somewhere in the house, such as organizing in the refrigerator and going home early to redelivery of home delivery. In the case of a full -time housewife, there are many cases where you have time to stay at home, and your wife is a wife. In addition, at the beginning of marriage, couples who are dual -income work are "husbands outside, wife is home" due to childbirth and childcare, so the amount of housekeeping is naturally increasing. I will do it. In the Corona evil, my husband had more time at home, and it should have been shared, but when the Corona calms down and the number of work increases, "Nameless Housework" becomes my wife's job with implicit consent. It's easy. Then, "Nameless Housework" means that my wife is sharing in the meantime, as before the Corona evil. In fact, it occurs when my husband is at home I don't want to keep it, so I tend to pass through my wife's stress and burden on "unnamed housework." Even if you do it, you will do it roughly even if you do it, and as a result, your wife is overwhelmingly doing an unnamed housework. ".What is the shape and method of "housework sharing" to maintain or improve the marital relationship well?Mr. Kimura: To some extent, it is recommended that you decide the items to be shared by your husband and keep it on the table. Even if you say it alone, your husband will forget it immediately, or your wife will follow you.It's not very effective, so write out the "unnamed housework" between a couple into "one collaborative work", and make an appropriate adjustment while actually doing housework. For example., I tried to get my husband to replace the tissue box, but I'm not good at crushing the empty box, and my wife may eventually increase. In such a case, "Replacement of toilet paper".It is important to make the item of "Nameless Housework" with two people, such as changing to, and to make it flexible and continuing. "Q..Many people are dissatisfied every day due to the biased burden of "unnamed housework" and the stress that does not transmit it to the other party. Mr. Kimura "There are cases where the biased burden of" Nameless Housework "comes from giving up. It's easier to do it yourself. In order not to be so, it's not "I want you to understand", but to say "I want you to do this". "I don't know how hard I am. If you appeal, "It's hard here, I don't know the stress of work -related", and the relationship gets worse. □□ is a request. Then, because the room can always be kept clean. "" I can do this, but I want you to do it. " Q.What is the awareness and behavior of each husband and wife, which is required on a daily basis, to prevent passing and trouble between married couples caused by housework. Mr. Kimura: First of all, the wife is to use her husband's desire for approval well. A man is a creature that wants to be recognized in something. It is the same for his boss and his wife. In the housework, "I was really saved by you," "Thank you, thank you, thank you for doing something I am not good at." Working and thinking, "I'll be happy to help you. Let's do it again." Also, the husband understands that "Wife wants to be sympathetic." Even if you say good, if you don't come to the intentions and say, "No, I know your feelings well," it's easy to return to "I don't know". , "I will do this," and it is necessary to understand that my wife is seeking action. If you read the psychology you are looking for, and make words, attitudes, and actions, you have a significant trouble. You should be able to prevent it. "

Adult editorial department